O ar frio da madrugada fazia companhia à aflição que precedia a hora da partida. Ele e ela que há algumas horas atrás eram apenas um amontoado de suspiros seguidos de mordidas, eram agora uma promessa que levantava dúvidas em ambos os corações. Em pé, um na frente do outro, os dois se fitavam suspeitos de si mesmos e ao mesmo tempo incertos do que poderiam esperar do amanhã. Os olhares absortos um no olhar do outro estavam como se esperassem a tortura que se apresentava inevitável e breve.
Uma saudade se debatendo para tomar posse já se manifestava no silêncio de um que era maior que o silêncio do outro. Na rodoviária, permaneciam os dois clandestinos dos seus próprios sentimentos. Uns rostos estranhos e presenças peculiares que em outra ocasião despertariam medo eram agora pormenores que rodeavam aquilo que ambos chamavam de mesmo caminho depois de extensas caminhadas solitárias.
Já chamavam os passageiros aos poucos e uma fila ia se criando para que todos se pusessem nos seus lugares. Era anunciada a hora, a hora que se arrastava e se segurava firme a todos os momentos tão agradáveis que tinham se sucedido até então. Os dois se agarraram determinados num abraço quase angustiado e então deram espaço a um tumulto de beijos tão honestos que encheram ambos os olhos de lágrimas. O alvoroço de carinhos era de alguma forma uma tentativa de captar, ainda que por um último instante, toda a essência da outra criatura.
- Um dia a gente ainda vai se encontrar de novo? – disse ela, rompendo o silêncio com a voz um tanto desolada.
- Sim, a gente ainda vai se encontrar de novo. Eu prometo. – disse ele enquanto entrava no ônibus e se virava para deixar um sorriso antes de partir.
The frozen night’s breeze accompanied the affliction that preceded the farewell. They, that a few hours ago were a disorder of breathing followed by bites, now were a promise that raised doubts in both of their hearts. Standing, one right in front of the other, they gazed upon themselves suspicious of their inner thoughts, questioning what they could expect from tomorrow. The glances they gave each other were as if they were waiting the torture that approached inevitable.
The feeling of incompleteness struggling inside of them was gradually trying to take possession of their minds. Even though they were not assured of their own perceptions of what was happening inside of them, the sensation of loss was quite clear and, therefore, hurtful.
The strange faces that arose from the late night were looming but they were not so alarmed. The unique alarm was the consternation that was emanating from the last goodbye. They walked for a long while apart from each other, until they started to follow the same path again. They soon would have to learn how to walk again.
She thought she should start getting used to departures, but there is something in her that was not made to pronounce hopefuls “see you later” and definitive “goodbyes.” The same part that fills the eyes with soreness and, at the same time, dries the throat. Only the time would attenuate the intensity of the pain that remains. The wound, though, would be quiet somewhere deep inside, the same place that was starting to collapse inside of both them.
A voice started to call for the passengers. The time had come, and the minutes were crawling while they held firmly in all the delighted moments that had happened up until then. They grabbed each other’s arms in an almost worried hug, and then gave space to love so honest it made them cry. The tumult of affection was in a certain way an attempt to catch, even for a moment, all the essence of the other creature.
He took his bag from the floor and the weight was nothing in comparison to the load of the situation that they were going through. They had known each other for a short time, but unexpectedly they were living as if there was no life in the absence of the other.
Far from her, he would probably start to seek in other arms the warm hugs that only her arms could give to him. Away from him, she would soon start to look for someone else whose fever was similar to the fever she found on his kisses.
“Yes. We will see each other again. I promise you,” he replied while approaching for the final goodbye.
He left, and while he was entering the bus, he turned his head back and smiled. Leaving, he carried her smile away in his.